LOST character of the week

I can haz mummified arm?

Vincent! Love him! He may actually be my favorite LOST character. First of all, who doesn’t love a yellow lab? Secondly, it does my heart good to see at least one survivor bouncing around like they’re in paradise, no matter what is going on to the survivors. Thirdly, I’m pretty sure that Vincent is the mastermind behind the island. He knows everything that’s going on, he’s everybody’s friend, and I think he may be the being who created and controls the island. Just because I’d love it if the series ended with a talking, vindictive dog. I’m just kidding, I would hate that with the heat of a thousand suns.

So what’s Vinny’s story? Well, Vin belonged to Brian Porter, the anal retentive stepfather of miracle-grow Walt. When Walt’s mom died, Michael took Vincent when he came to pick up Walt. Walt told his dad that it was wrong and Michael lied to his kid and told him that Brian wanted Walt to have the dog. It would have looked better if he had put one of those big bows on him, like from the Lexus Christmas commercials.

Vincent had to ride in the luggage compartment of the plane, which is probably why he doesn’t care about the survivors. They didn’t care enough to pretend he was a seeing-eye-dog and let him sit in coach where he could get some peanuts. Why should he care about them on the island? Be good to your dog. That’s all I’m going to say.

Jack wakes up after the crash to see a happy Vincent giving him a look of love before he bounces off into the jungle to chase polar bears and boars and that bird that screams Hurley’s name. Vincent spent his early days on the island running away from Walt. Walt would find him and Vincent would run away again. It was great fun for Vincent. Not so much fun for Walt. Ever seen a kid with an ulcer? I’m betting Walt has one now thanks to dog stress, being kidnapped by a boatload of banjo playing ninjas, and his stint as a dripping hologram. Locke eventually makes a dog whistle, because he’s the island MacGyver, and Vincent comes running. Locke is the man.

Later on, Vincent wakes everyone up with his barking. I can relate because my neighbor’s dog does this every night. Only my neighbor’s dog barks at dumb things like trees and air. Vincent was actually letting the survivors know that those pesky boars were running their own panty raid on the camp.

Michael and Walt had a fight because Michael caught Walt actually having a good time with Locke. Walt storms off into the jungle and Vincent gives his , “Yo, somethin’s not copasetic here” bark. Turns out there was a polar bear and it was licking it’s chops for some Walt. Walt hides in a tree that might be a bush. Where’s Vincent? He ran away. You would have done the same thing, admit it.

Vincent also interrupts Michael when he tries to kiss Sun, effectively preventing an affair. I told you he was a wonder dog.

Walt leaves and doesn’t want to take Vincent with him, so he leaves him with the most irresponsible person on the island, Shannon. And she promptly loses him. Is anyone surprised?

Vincent brought Hurley the key to the VW van he so desperately wanted to drive. He also brought the arm of Roger Workman, but he’s a dog. Cut him some slack. He was just trying to help, and a bone looks tasty to a dog.

After Ben moved the island, Vincent, Rose, and Bernard retired together in the jungle in the year 1974. This was the best possible ending for Vincent.

My thoughts on Vincent and the series finale: It is very possible that everyone on this island will die. Everyone except Vincent. He belongs there. No one, not even Locke, took to the island the way Vincent did. I love his character because you know he knows everything. He knows the Dharma stations. He knows the Others (more than likely). He knows all the secrets.

Sawyer Nicknames: Lassie, Marmaduke, Old Yeller

Connections: Vincent has met every main cast member at some point or another, according to Lostpedia. I think that he only met Walt and Michael off of the island, but I may be wrong.

Sources: lostpedia, a lot of episodes, my memory and brain.

Who's my next victim?