LOST Recap

Voiceover man is promising answers again. I may kick him in the shin if he's lying.

They show Uncle Rico shooting Sayid and Sayid coming back to life and being branded.

A taxi with Sayid is sitting in front of a respectable little house. He rings the bell and finds Nadia on the other side. They hug and I can feel the love. The sexual tension is so palpable, you could slice it with a butter knife. Sayid brought flowers for Nadia, but it turns out that Nadia is married to Sayid's brother. They also left the front door open because they were all raised in barns. Sayid's brother takes a business call during dinner, against Nadia's wishes. She's been sending Sayid letters and Sayid's all, "Girl, you're married to my brother. Stop hitting on me." Nadia finds out that Sayid has been carrying a picture of her around and Sayid's brother is maaaaaddddd. Awkward....

Sayid stomps into the head samurai's office and demands answers about the machine and the test. Samurai insists on being all cryptic. He basically tells Sayid that he's evil and he wants Sayid dead. At least he's honest. Sayid claims to be a good man. For this Samurai unleashes on him and they fight in an epic martial arts battle to the death. Samurai almost kills Sayid but stops when his baseball falls to the ground, proving that sports will distract men from ANYTHING important. Samurai kicks Sayid out of the temple. No island hot tub parties for you anymore, buddy. I think the spirit of Jacob is in the baseball, and that's why Samurai is so protective of it.

DarthLocke is asking Claire to go into the temple. DarthLocke promises her if she goes in that he'll get Aaron back for her. She asks if he's going to hurt them and he says only the ones who won't listen. And we go to a commercial about how the world will end in 2012. Man, those Mayans were a bunch of Debbie Downers.

Sayid is asleep on Nadia's couch and older brother wakes him up and Sayid busts his chops for it. Brother tells Sayid he's in trouble, that he borrowed $$ to pay for the second store. Brother wants Sayid to "convince" them to leave him alone. *wink wink* Sayid protests but brother spins a sob story and begs him to do it, for Nadia. Way to dangle your wife out there like a prize, brother.

Miles comes over and asks Sayid what's up. He's confused when Sayid told him he was banished. Miles tells him that he wasn't saved by the temple-ites. Claire is forced through the door at gunpoint. She orders Samurai to speak English. She tells him that DarthLocke wants to speak to him outside of the temple. He asks for Hurley and Jack, but Woodstock tells him that Jack and Hurley are gone. Samurai asks Sayid to go with him and Sayid is confused, but complies. Miles stands there with a confused look on his face. In tonight's episode, Pre-English Jin will be played by Miles. Samurai questions Sayid about Jack and Hurley and Sayid asks about Claire. Samurai tells Sayid about DarthLocke and asks Sayid to kill him. He gives Sayid a dagger. Samurai asks Sayid to prove that he is still good.

Sayid's niece and nephew ask how long he's visiting and he says, "Not long, suckas!" and puts them on the school bus. Nadia yells for Sayid and they got a hospital. There's Jack in the hospital! Nadia's husband has been "mugged." Sayid is going to kick some boo-tay. Nadia begs him not to go and asks him to go home and wait for the kids.

Sayid is stomping through the jungle and comes across Kate. Is he going to stab her?! Oh man. No luck this time. We still have Kate. They let her back in the temple and Miles is psyched to have someone else back who wears real shoes instead of homemade sandals. He tries to comfort her about Sawyer. Miles tells her that Claire is back. He said she was weird, but hot. Kate asks where she is.

Sayid is still walking in the jungle and stops to get a drink. Someone is watching him. We all know it's the smoke monster. The trees are wickedly blowing around. DarthLocke steps out and Sayid stabs him. DarthLocke just pulls the dagger out and Sayid is freaked out.

DarthLocke only has a hole in his shirt. He's the friendly type and he gives Sayid his dagger back. DarthLocke tells John that Dogan knew Sayid couldn't kill Locke and hoped Locke would kill Sayid. What if DarthLocke isn't evil but Jacob is evil? I'm confused. Locke tells Sayid he can have anything he wants if he delivers a message for Dogan.

Sayid is trying to fix a vase at Nadia's house that the kids broke with a boomerang. Nadia laughs. She says brother is recovering. Sayid offers to give her money and she said it's Brother's problem and responsibility. She asks Sayid why he didn't choose to be with her and he says he's trying to redeem himself. He says he can't be with her because he doesn't deserve her.

Sayid goes back to the temple with Dogan. He ignores Dogan and announced that DarthLocke says Jacob is dead and everyone at the temple is free and DarthLocke is leaving the island and will take anyone who wants to go. He says they have until sundown to decide and anyone who stays after sundown is dead.

Kate roughs up Woodstock and demands to be taken to Claire. She's in a hole, singing "Catch a Falling Star." Claire is pissed to see Kate staring down at her because she totally interrupted Claire's song. She's so rude. Kate explains that she took Aaron off of the island and raised him and rubs Claire's face in the fact that she got to raise Aaron. She said she came back to rescue Claire and Claire says she's not the one who needs to be rescued. She tells Kate "He's coming. He's coming and they can't stop him." with a creepy grin on her face.

Everyone is going nuts at the temple and Woodstock is trying to create order. He gets up in Sayid's face. Cindy takes the 815 kids and leaves. Sayid says he has to return the dagger and goes off to find Samurai Dogan.

Bald guy in a black SUV pulls up to Nadia's house and tells Sayid to get in the car. This show is creating an unfair evil stereotype of bald men. Just saying. They go to a diner. Guy who shot Alex offers to make Sayid some eggs. Gah, he said no, like, five times. No means no, Keamey. Keamey wants Sayid to give him the $$ to protect Nadia and the kids. Sayid asks if Keamey put Brother in the hospital. Keamey says no. Sayid has had enough and takes out both of Keamey's thugs. Keamey's scared now and promises that the debt is forgiven and even says "fuggetaboudit." Sayid blows him away because he's hardcore. Someone is beating on the freezer door and Sayid goes to investigate. It's Jin. SU-WHEET. I wonder if Jin's sweet old father-in-law set Jin up with that watch. Deliver the watch to Keamey and that's his payment to take Jin out of Sun's life. Hmmmmmm....

Dogan is sitting dejectedly by the hot tub, staring at his baseball. Sayid drops the dagger and asks Dogan why he didn't kill him himself. Dogan says he was a businessman once in Osaka and he got a promotion and went out with his coworkers to celebrate and got wasted. He went to pick his son up from baseball and critically injured his son in a drunk-driving accident. Jacob came to Dogan in the hospital and said he could save Dogan's son if Dogan came to the island and never saw his son again. Sayid sits down and asks who the man was. Dogan says "Jacob." Dogan guesses that DarthLocke offered Sayid a similar bargin. Sayid says he's going to stay and then bodyslams Dogan into the hot tub where they make the temple tea. He then drowns Dogan. Woodstock is freaking out and dives into the tea. Woodstock yells that Dogan was the only thing keeping DarthLocke out. Sayid then kills Woodstock. I know he was annoying, but dang, Sayid.

Kate grabs Miles and they run from the melee in the temple. The smoke monster is unleashing on everyone. Kate goes after Claire. Miles ditches her because she's a load. He hides in a room but someone is pounding on the door to get in. It's Illana and Lepedis to the rescue! Kate runs in to get Claire and has to jump down in the pit because Smokey comes barreling through. Ben finds Sayid in the hot tub room. Sayid's a freakmonster now and Ben slowly backs away in a "don't make any sudden movements around the psycho" way. Miles reveals to Sun that Jin is alive. Illana is looking for a special symbol on the wall. She pushes a secret room open and they all hide inside, just as Smokey sweeps around the corner.

Sayid walks among the death in the courtyard. Claire looks around smirking and Kate is visibly disturbed. She stops to pick up a gun and then follows Claire and Sayid out of the temple to where DarthLocke is waiting. DarthLocke gives Kate the eyeball, not in the "I like you way," but in the "I may turn into a pillar of smoke and bludgeon you to death" kind of way.

The end. And no real answers. Voiceover guy, you are such a tease.

OH FREAKING NO! Voiceover guy just said Ben was going to die! I think my heart just deflated.